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In fact, the lingam has a deeply inward and spiritual meaning; it has nothing to do with phallic fantasies, stimulated by Freudian symbolism.
The lingam, considered as a symbol of spiritual inwardness, represents-again-the spine. To argue against the Western explanation for the lingam would be to give it more dignity, even as a mis-conception, than it deserves.
The Shiva lingam represents what religion most needs: an inward focus, and rising energy in the spine. Balagangadhara have disputed the sexual meaning of lingam.
the lines traced on the front side of the linga, which are prescribed in medieval manuals about temple foundation and are a feature even of modern sculptures, appear to be intended to suggest a stylised glans, and some features of the installation process seem intended to echo sexual congress. According to Alain Daniélou, "The lingam is an external sign, a symbol.
The lingam is a column-like or oval (egg-shaped) symbol of Shiva, the Formless All-pervasive Reality, made of stone, metal, or clay.Some associate Shiva-Linga with this Yupa-Stambha, the sacrificial post.In the hymn, a description is found of the beginning-less and endless Stambha or Skambha, and it is shown that the said Skambha is put in place of the eternal Brahman.No devout Hindu thinks of it in that way, even if-one suspects-few Hindus really understand what the lingam means.One might point out, however-to show the absurdity of the western explanation ”that if the lingam were really a symbol of fertility as is claimed, it ought more properly to have been assigned to almost any other deity than Shiva, the god of destruction".
There is a tradition of Tantric sexuality of mithuna which uses sacred sex as part of Yoga practice.